Saturday, April 28, 2012
April 29, 2012
About Me
I am really trying to get this blog rolling. Unfortunately, I need a computer class. Or, my eleven year old needs to stay home from school and set the page up for me. I like to write. I do not like to read computer manuals. Anyway, this post is supposed to be under the "About Me" section. But, of course, I can't figure out how to make it appear. And now I am tired so I am putting it here for now. Baby steps.
****
Craig and I were married almost ten years before our first Lovely, Abigail, was born. We were busy...attending law school...accumulating student loan debt...paying off student loan debt.
Then suddenly, we were thirty-two years old. After a year of infertility treatments Abigail was conceived and eight months later she was born. It was a miserable pregnancy by any standard. But, you know what they say, "Childbirth is the easiest pain to forget." Apparently, it is true because we had two more children in the next three-and-a-half years.
I knew within the first two seconds of holding Abigail that I would not be returning to the practice of law. I remember looking at her and thinking, "I would give my life in a heartbeat for you." And I would, for any of the Lovelies. People often ask me if I miss being a lawyer. The short answer is, "No." Initially, I missed the clothes and the lunches with friends. But, eventually, I got new clothes and new friends. And I really liked being home with my three Lovelies.
When Marie turned two years old, I began to wonder what on earth I was going to do with my life after my kids were in school. I like to know where I am headed and am a neurotic planner. My bible study friends prayed for me as I fretted about my uncertain future.
In the midst of all of this self-imposed worry, I felt like there was still one more child waiting to join our family. But, time marched on. I turned forty and began to let that fourth dream go.
God did not. He must have heard that cry in my heart because shortly before I turned forty-one our fourth child was conceived. And thirty-one weeks later Jonathan roared into the world.
This blog is about the plans God had for my future, and about His plans for my four Lovelies. He must have been rolling his eyes during all that anxious praying before Jonathan was conceived. He knew He was preparing a blessing so huge I could not imagine it in my wildest dreams. I am writing this blog to share the miracles God blesses our family with everyday so that all can see His magnificent glory, provision and faithfulness.
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
Circle Maker
Hi -
I'm reading this fabulous book called The Circle Maker by Mark Batterson. In sum, it is a practical and inspiring book about how to draw prayer circles around your family, your dreams, your fears and the promises of God. It is the best book I have read in a long, long time. Maybe because I have a big family, a lot of dreams, some fears and desperate need to see God's promises for me materialize.
This year when people started talking about things they were "giving up" for Lent I realized that is a tradition I haven't followed in recent years. I tried to think of something truly sacrificial I could abstain from and there was really only one worthy contender...coffee. Unfortunately, if I did that I would be risking my kid's lives by driving my minivan in a semiconscious state. So, I decided to draw prayer circles instead.
My kids think my dinner marches around the table are hilarious...but they love being the subject of my prayers. All of my other prayer circles have been done from the driver's seat of my minivan. It is St. Paul. It is March. Since Lent began, I have driven around our new block in St. Paul, my kid's school (several times) and my friend's house. My plan is to circle my husband's office building later this week - seven times - he needs some Jericho walls to tumble. Maybe I'll give Jono a trumpet to blow.
I have abstained from a lot of sugar and Diet Coke during past Lenten seasons and I have never seen results like these circles. I have ben praying that my kid's school will see increased visibility and enrollment for next year. One kindergarten class is full. I prayed that my whole family would not come down with strep throat after Abigail's test came back positive. Historically, my kids share every illness and it lingers around the house for about a month. No strep infestation. I have prayed multiple circles around Jono - most of them about his language acquisition. This has been the most profound and noticeable answer to prayer. I am not keeping a tally sheet (although I think I may start), but he has added about a work a DAY since I first circled him. To put this in perspective for you, Jono only had about 25 words when I circled him - he probably has forty now. And he uses them outside our home. At preschool the teachers gave him an apple slice and he said "apple." He has started asking for help at preschool by using the word "help." He walked over to the refrigerator, yanked the door open and said "I ____ apple juice!" Whew! I gave him the whole jug.
This has been the best Lenten observation (clearly it is not sacrificial or denial) I have ever made. Not only am I keeping the coffee, I am cashing in on slews of God's promises for myself, my children and my friends. Prayer is not a new thing for me and the circle is figurative, but Mr. Batterson suggests a plan to implement your prayer life. For a planner like me, his advice is priceless.
Jill
I'm reading this fabulous book called The Circle Maker by Mark Batterson. In sum, it is a practical and inspiring book about how to draw prayer circles around your family, your dreams, your fears and the promises of God. It is the best book I have read in a long, long time. Maybe because I have a big family, a lot of dreams, some fears and desperate need to see God's promises for me materialize.
This year when people started talking about things they were "giving up" for Lent I realized that is a tradition I haven't followed in recent years. I tried to think of something truly sacrificial I could abstain from and there was really only one worthy contender...coffee. Unfortunately, if I did that I would be risking my kid's lives by driving my minivan in a semiconscious state. So, I decided to draw prayer circles instead.
My kids think my dinner marches around the table are hilarious...but they love being the subject of my prayers. All of my other prayer circles have been done from the driver's seat of my minivan. It is St. Paul. It is March. Since Lent began, I have driven around our new block in St. Paul, my kid's school (several times) and my friend's house. My plan is to circle my husband's office building later this week - seven times - he needs some Jericho walls to tumble. Maybe I'll give Jono a trumpet to blow.
I have abstained from a lot of sugar and Diet Coke during past Lenten seasons and I have never seen results like these circles. I have ben praying that my kid's school will see increased visibility and enrollment for next year. One kindergarten class is full. I prayed that my whole family would not come down with strep throat after Abigail's test came back positive. Historically, my kids share every illness and it lingers around the house for about a month. No strep infestation. I have prayed multiple circles around Jono - most of them about his language acquisition. This has been the most profound and noticeable answer to prayer. I am not keeping a tally sheet (although I think I may start), but he has added about a work a DAY since I first circled him. To put this in perspective for you, Jono only had about 25 words when I circled him - he probably has forty now. And he uses them outside our home. At preschool the teachers gave him an apple slice and he said "apple." He has started asking for help at preschool by using the word "help." He walked over to the refrigerator, yanked the door open and said "I ____ apple juice!" Whew! I gave him the whole jug.
This has been the best Lenten observation (clearly it is not sacrificial or denial) I have ever made. Not only am I keeping the coffee, I am cashing in on slews of God's promises for myself, my children and my friends. Prayer is not a new thing for me and the circle is figurative, but Mr. Batterson suggests a plan to implement your prayer life. For a planner like me, his advice is priceless.
Jill
Monday, March 5, 2012
Three Years Later
Hi All -
It has been a long time. Since I wrote on this blog. Since Jonathan came into our lives.
But...parts of the day Jonathan was born seem like they happened ten minutes ago. I can remember the minute the neonatologist told me he believed Jonathan had Down Syndrome. I can remember the fear washing over me and the desparation creeping into to my head and heart. I was so scared.
One of my first thoughts was, "What have we done to our other kids?" My second, "What if he can't do what we like? What if he hates swimming?" My last, "What if he hates to do crafts like my other kids?" Crazy! Clearly, I was not appreciating Jono's predicament. Jono was nine weeks premature, had Down Syndrome, had a mysterious blood leukemia and at least ten other medical problems any one of which would have been a significant concern in my other children, but for Jono fell right off my radar. And I was worried about swimming and crafts.
Of course, as the weeks and months went on I realized that Jono had more pressing concerns that the painting and water sports. And God faithfully healed Jonathan of every one of the ailments that is threatened his life. But, the coolest part? Over the last three years God answered my "crazy" prayers too. He didn't just save Jono's life. He fixed everything. Just like I asked.
First, he showed me how Jonathan would effect Abigail, Luke and Marie. My kids prayed for a brother throughout my entire pregnancy - we needed another boy - to be "fair." (We were at a "fairness" stage then. Oh - we still are.) They picked out names for him and dreamed of a cuddly baby boy. He was, to put it mildly, highly anticipated. When he was born, I thought they would be disappointed or sad. I really didn't know what to think - but I assumed things would not go well. Oh, was I wrong. From the moment Abigail, Luke and Marie saw Jono they loved him. They have always known he has Down Syndrome. I told them the night before he came home from the NICU. I read them a picture book and explained that Jono might have a hard time learning and may look a little different - that was all I could muster at the time. They didn't care then and they don't care now.
When they have stories to write at school, the stories always have Jono as a character. When Luke built his second grade rocket he put his and Jono's name on the rocket and described their journey to the Bubble-Gum planet in his story. When Abigail has a bad day, she doesn't cuddle with me - she cuddles Jono. When Marie grows up she is going to be a speech therapist. For now, she has a clinic in her bedroom with activities to help Jono talk more. And Luke got his wrestling partner - Jono is tough. Luke may outweigh him, but Jono has learned how to swing his big head and pull hair if he needs to even the playing field.
Jono and the swimming pool. Did you hear me say full-submersion, independent jump off the side, come up laughing at age 2? Jono loves the pool; the beach; the lake;and the bathtub if that is all that is available.
The crafts. Jono started preschool at the same preschool his siblings attended in St. Paul after Christmas. Marie was there when he was born, and I can remember wondering where Jono would be when he was preschool age. Well, Jono is sitting in her old chair painting pictures and learning his colors. One day, his teachers came out and asked me if I knew how much Jono likes crafts. That is when I remembered my first crazy concerns. And that is when I knew that my God is so faithful, so loving and so complete that He takes care of everthing. Every last detail. He really does care about the small stuff.
Jonathan is the happiest, most joy-filled little boy I know. God has big plans for him. I wish I could have seen my life today when I was pregnant. I wasted alot of time praying for something I wouldn't change if I could. I love every aspect of my son. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine feeling this love, acceptance and devotion three years after Jonathan's birth. I was thinking the hurt would always be there. But, God took that away too. And I never even asked Him to do that. I must have thought even He couldn't do that. Whew. I was so wrong.
Love, Jill
It has been a long time. Since I wrote on this blog. Since Jonathan came into our lives.
But...parts of the day Jonathan was born seem like they happened ten minutes ago. I can remember the minute the neonatologist told me he believed Jonathan had Down Syndrome. I can remember the fear washing over me and the desparation creeping into to my head and heart. I was so scared.
One of my first thoughts was, "What have we done to our other kids?" My second, "What if he can't do what we like? What if he hates swimming?" My last, "What if he hates to do crafts like my other kids?" Crazy! Clearly, I was not appreciating Jono's predicament. Jono was nine weeks premature, had Down Syndrome, had a mysterious blood leukemia and at least ten other medical problems any one of which would have been a significant concern in my other children, but for Jono fell right off my radar. And I was worried about swimming and crafts.
Of course, as the weeks and months went on I realized that Jono had more pressing concerns that the painting and water sports. And God faithfully healed Jonathan of every one of the ailments that is threatened his life. But, the coolest part? Over the last three years God answered my "crazy" prayers too. He didn't just save Jono's life. He fixed everything. Just like I asked.
First, he showed me how Jonathan would effect Abigail, Luke and Marie. My kids prayed for a brother throughout my entire pregnancy - we needed another boy - to be "fair." (We were at a "fairness" stage then. Oh - we still are.) They picked out names for him and dreamed of a cuddly baby boy. He was, to put it mildly, highly anticipated. When he was born, I thought they would be disappointed or sad. I really didn't know what to think - but I assumed things would not go well. Oh, was I wrong. From the moment Abigail, Luke and Marie saw Jono they loved him. They have always known he has Down Syndrome. I told them the night before he came home from the NICU. I read them a picture book and explained that Jono might have a hard time learning and may look a little different - that was all I could muster at the time. They didn't care then and they don't care now.
When they have stories to write at school, the stories always have Jono as a character. When Luke built his second grade rocket he put his and Jono's name on the rocket and described their journey to the Bubble-Gum planet in his story. When Abigail has a bad day, she doesn't cuddle with me - she cuddles Jono. When Marie grows up she is going to be a speech therapist. For now, she has a clinic in her bedroom with activities to help Jono talk more. And Luke got his wrestling partner - Jono is tough. Luke may outweigh him, but Jono has learned how to swing his big head and pull hair if he needs to even the playing field.
Jono and the swimming pool. Did you hear me say full-submersion, independent jump off the side, come up laughing at age 2? Jono loves the pool; the beach; the lake;and the bathtub if that is all that is available.
The crafts. Jono started preschool at the same preschool his siblings attended in St. Paul after Christmas. Marie was there when he was born, and I can remember wondering where Jono would be when he was preschool age. Well, Jono is sitting in her old chair painting pictures and learning his colors. One day, his teachers came out and asked me if I knew how much Jono likes crafts. That is when I remembered my first crazy concerns. And that is when I knew that my God is so faithful, so loving and so complete that He takes care of everthing. Every last detail. He really does care about the small stuff.
Jonathan is the happiest, most joy-filled little boy I know. God has big plans for him. I wish I could have seen my life today when I was pregnant. I wasted alot of time praying for something I wouldn't change if I could. I love every aspect of my son. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine feeling this love, acceptance and devotion three years after Jonathan's birth. I was thinking the hurt would always be there. But, God took that away too. And I never even asked Him to do that. I must have thought even He couldn't do that. Whew. I was so wrong.
Love, Jill
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